14 Aug
Worst Writing Award
The winner of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest for worst writing said she was thrilled to have won the award in the Romance category. She won it by creating the worst opening line, which runs as follows:
“Bill swore the affair had ended, but Louise knew he was lying, after discovering Tupperware containers under the seat of his car, which were not the off-brand containers that she bought to save money, but authentic, burpable, lidded Tupperware; and she knew he would see that woman again, because unlike the flimsy, fake containers that should always be recycled responsibly, real Tupperware must be returned to its rightful owner.”
Wow. That’s pretty darn terrible. I suppose I’d be pretty proud to have thought of that opening line too.